The Iglu Guide | Blog
Phoning home – how often is often enough?
Moving away to university is a huge milestone, especially for international students navigating life in a new country. Staying in touch with family back home is often a lifeline, helping to ease the challenges of culture shock and homesickness while maintaining those vital connections.
It makes sense that parents want regular updates when their child steps into the big wide world. But how often should you really call?
The answer varies based on your relationship. Initially, frequent check-ins can help everyone adjust to the distance. Over time, you might find a rhythm that suits both parties, whether it’s a quick daily text or a weekly video call. The goal is to communicate enough to reassure your family that you’re safe and happy, while also giving yourself space to grow independently.
Here’s a helpful guide to balancing independence and communication, so you and your family can thrive during this transition.
Navigating culture shock
Moving to a new country often comes with an adjustment period, known as culture shock. From language barriers to unfamiliar customs, the transition can feel overwhelming. Sharing these experiences with family can provide a sense of comfort and normalcy. It’s okay to acknowledge that you’re finding things challenging – honesty often brings families closer.
Staying connected across time zones
Time zone differences can make scheduling calls tricky. Tools like shared calendars or agreeing on a regular “call window” can help bridge the gap. A quick message, like “Thinking of you,” can also go a long way when calls aren’t feasible.
Building a new independence
Some students worry that keeping in close contact might hinder their independence. However, staying in touch doesn’t mean losing your autonomy. Parents often appreciate being included in your journey, whether it’s seeking advice or sharing milestones. A simple “What do you think about this?” can keep them involved without feeling overbearing.
Managing expectations
While it might be tempting to only reach out when you need something, maintaining regular communication builds a stronger connection. Parents often feel more appreciated when they’re not just the “Bank of Mum and Dad.” A thoughtful text or quick call can make a big difference, showing them that they’re valued beyond financial support.
The power of video calls
Text messages are great for quick updates, but they can’t replace the warmth of a call. Video calls, in particular, offer the closest experience to being together, allowing you to share your surroundings and expressions. They’re perfect for those meaningful conversations about your new life, challenges, and achievements.
Finding balance
Balancing studies, social life, and communication can be tricky. That’s why it helps to set realistic expectations with your family early on. Whether it’s a scheduled weekly call or spontaneous chats, consistency helps everyone feel connected. If you’re busy, a quick message to reschedule shows thoughtfulness and keeps the relationship strong.
Benefits of distance
Living away from home often deepens family relationships. Conversations grow beyond the “How was school?” days, evolving into meaningful discussions about academics, global issues, and personal growth. Parents can offer invaluable advice and a listening ear, drawing from their own experiences. This mutual respect and understanding can transform your bond, making it even stronger despite the miles.
Final thoughts
Moving abroad is a journey of self-discovery and growth. Staying in touch with family can provide the support you need to thrive while helping them feel reassured. Whether it’s sharing the joys of new experiences or leaning on them during tough times, the connection you maintain is a reminder that love knows no distance.
